My husband, my father, my son-in-law, and all the other dads in my life all say they want nothing for their birthday or Christmas.
I have learned the secret after decades of this. They do not want nothing, they want things they would never spend money on for themselves.
Here are my twenty-seven proven winners. Each one has been opened by a man who said he wanted nothing, and every one of them got used.
The Fancy Jerky He Would Never Buy Himself
I know dads love jerky. In fact, they could eat it for the rest of their lives. Dads will buy the cheapest jerky from the gas station. But if you get them a box of jerky with real cuts and fun flavors, it will be gone within the week. Since it is a consumable, it won’t clutter the garage. This is my go to gift for the ones that are impossible to buy for.
A Flashlight That Could Signal the Moon
I have no clue why every guy wants a more powerful flashlight, and I’ve given up asking. One of those ultra-bright ones shows up in his hand every single evening walk and power outage for the next ten years. He’ll show it to other guys, who will nod in appreciation. It is probably 8 bucks per year of satisfaction.
The Multi-Tool That Lives on His Belt
A high-quality multi-tool will probably become your father’s main tool after he first unwraps it. It will be used on any and every screw or thread that needs adjustments around the house. My husband uses his every day and talks about it weekly. For the price of a dinner out, it might be the highest-mileage gift there is.
Whiskey Stones and One Heavy Glass
Does your dad like to enjoy a drink in the evening? Then get him the stones and one super heavy glass. It will turn his regular nightcap into a little event, and dads love events. The glass makes a big difference. The weight makes the whole thing feel deserved. From that day on, he will use nothing else.
A Hot Sauce Lineup He Can Brag About
Every time there is a cookout, he gets a collection of stories to share about his hot sauce set. He ranks them, gives warnings about the third one, and protects his favorite hot sauce like a goalie. It really brightens a season’s worth of dinners. Competitive, personal, and consumable. The dad trifecta.
Steak Night Where He Runs the Grill
Not only are you offering a seasoning, you are declaring a steak night and letting him run it. Good steaks, a serious rub, and the whole family gathered while he does the thing he loves. He gets the meal and the audience both. It costs less than a restaurant and he will talk about it for a month.
The Candy He Loved When He Was Ten
Every grown man has a boy inside of him who has a favorite candy that nobody remembers. Figure out what it is and buy a bunch of it. When my father got a box of taffy from his childhood he just went quiet and then started telling stories for an hour. It’s a two-dollar time machine.
A Pillow That Costs More Than He Approves Of
No dad on earth has ever replaced his own pillow. He is sleeping on one that is over a decade old and claims that it is fine. A truly nice pillow is a luxury that he would never permit for himself, which is the whole point. He will complain about the cost and then defend that pillow like it is a family member.
Grill Tools That Do Not Bend
The tongs he has were given away free with some promotion in 2011 and they wobble. A proper set of grilling tools with real handles will change his entire summer posture. This is the gear for his favourite job and good gear is respect. He will feel the difference in weight the moment he lifts them.
The Mug That Keeps Coffee Hot Until Noon
Dads drink half their coffee cold, in the truck, on the job site, out in the yard. A serious insulated mug means the last sip is as hot as the first, three hours later. It rides along everywhere he goes and becomes part of his silhouette. My husband’s has been through nine winters, and he mentions it every single one.
Slippers With Actual Soles
He walks outside to get the paper wearing the first thing he could find at the door. Slippers with real soles that you can walk on driveways with have been a revelation to a guy who has never had good ones. They are like a bathrobe for your feet, but like, actually shoes. He will wear them until they break, then he will ask for the same pair.
The Massage Gun for the Back He Swears Is Fine
He says his back is fine and winces while standing up. He is able to self-treat his pain using a massage gun, without having to acknowledge anything to anyone. It sits by his chair, and gets used nightly during the game. This is one of the most modern and most appreciated items on my list.
Work Gloves That Actually Fit
He owns gloves, and every pair is stiff, torn, or two sizes off. Really, good fitting work gloves are a spiritual experience for your hands. After one pair, every garage project and yard job involves those gloves. No one goes out and buys themselves nice gloves, and that is why they make such great gifts.
The Bird Feeder He Will Pretend Not to Love
Put up a solid bird feeder where he sips his morning coffee and wait three weeks, he will go from mild interest to full on birdwatching complete with binoculars and hot takes on squirrels. It is a gradual gift, until it becomes his favorite thing. Every father becomes a bird man eventually, you are just speeding up the inevitable.
A Car Kit That Makes Saturday Satisfying
An excellent car detailing kit makes it easy to turn an hour into a small ritual. Washing and waxing the car using quality microfiber cloths and maybe shining the tires is all part of the process. The car looks good afterward, but that is not really the point. The point is an hour outside with a job to do, a hose, and nobody needing anything from him.
The Jump Starter He Will Rescue People With
A portable jump starter sits in the trunk and waits for its moment. When that day comes, and it will, he gets to rescue somebody in a parking lot and be the hero of the day. He will retell that story for years. You are not giving a battery, you are giving a future legend.
A Proper Pocket Knife
A pocket knife is a classic gift for a dad and what makes it even better is that it never fails. For years and years it has been a handy tool for opening boxes, letters and stubbornly taped packages. Pick out a good durable one that he will eventually be able to pass down to the next generation. Some gifts are traditions, and this is one of them.
The Wool Blanket for the Truck and the Bleachers
A wool blanket sits folded behind his seat for cold games, tailgates, and roadside picnics. It is precisely the sort of thing he’d never purchase, yet somehow he’ll end up using it two hundred times. In a few years, it’ll be covered with the smell of campfires and be even more worn. Pragmatic and slightly sentimental, although he would never use that phrase.
The Zero Gravity Chair for Championship Napping
A fully reclining chair turns any shaded area in the yard into a napping zone. Sure, he’ll say it’s for watching the grill, but within a week it’s his outdoor command center, and by August there will be a permanent divot in the grass shaped like him. Very few presents provide this much happiness in such a short period of time.
Rechargeable Hand Warmers for the Cold Seats
For the dad at the six a.m. game, in the deer stand, or shoveling the walk, warm hands change everything. Rechargeable hand warmers do the job for hours, with no trip to the store for the disposable kind. He will call them unnecessary and then charge them every night from October on. That is dad talk for I love them.
A Slim Wallet to Retire the Brick
He is sitting on a leather brick stuffed with 2019 receipts. A slim wallet pushes his essentials in and forces the archeology out. His back pocket, and honestly his back, will thank you. One full day of complaining is to be expected along with ten years of daily use.
A Photo of the Grandkids He Can Hold
Most dads may not look through the family photo albums but a printed picture of the grandkids on his desk or in his workshop is something he will see every day. Because of this, you should have the picture framed before you give it to him so it doesn’t get thrown in a drawer. It’s inexpensive to do this. It will become one of his most treasured things, and he will never say so out loud.
The Biography He Will Read Twice
Look for a biography about someone your dad admires. This could be a president, coach, construction person, or musician. Dads that say they don’t read will actually read a book about a real person. Also, write a note on the inside cover to explain why you thought of your dad when you found this book. The note is half of the present.
His Favorite Meal, No Occasion Attached
Prepare his favorite meal without a special reason, occasion, or day of the week. Just a pot roast or fried chicken like his mother used to make. Something made all for him, without asking, is so much more than any present. Observe his expression when he understands the intention behind it.
A Ticket for a Seat Right Next to You
Buy tickets for two people to the game, the car show, or the concert from his era. The gift is not the event, it’s the afternoon of you sitting next to him, and him having nowhere else to be. He won’t remember the score, but he will remember who was next to him. Tickets are just the container, but time is what he actually wants.
Ask Him to Teach You Something
Have him teach you how to change oil, sharpen knives, or make his chili. Dads love being needed for their special knowledge and skills. He will pretend it’s an inconvenience, but end up having a little lesson prepared. You gain a new ability, he gets an entire afternoon of importance, and it’s totally free.
An Afternoon of His Projects, With You In It
Volunteer to show up on a Saturday and help with whatever is on his list. No occasion, no clock. Hold the ladder, hand him wrenches, carpool to the hardware store. The project is the excuse, the company is the gift. The fathers who want nothing have been trying to tell us this the whole time.
